“I’ve reached that age where my brain goes from ‘You probably shouldn’t say that’ to ‘What the hell, let’s see what happens.'”— Unknown
“If you don’t like me and still watch everything I do, b-tch you are a fan.” — Unknown
“Good morning world! Your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.”— Unknown
“Sarchotic: When you’re so sarcastic people aren’t sure whether you’re joking or whether you’re just crazy.”— Unknown
“I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.” — Unknown
“Yes I walked away mid-conversation. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in.” — Unknown
“Me after death: slams gates of Hell open, takes off shoes, high fives Satan. ‘I’m home. What’s the f-cking WiFi password?'” — Unknown
“There’s no ‘we’ in fries.” — Unknown
“Mom always said, ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all’. And some people wonder why I’m so quiet around them.” — Unknown
“No matter how bad it gets, I’m always rich at the dollar store.”— Unknown
